Getting Baby to Sleep

2007-08-27T11:03:00.000-07:00

"I ain't going to sleep! You'll never take me alive!" At least, that's what I imagine this baby is saying.

I would like to help you with getting your baby to sleep! There is so much information out there on the subject, different philosophies, and you might not know where to start. But what you do know is that you need help, fast. It's hard enough being a parent as it is (wonderful job that it is, though); it's very difficult (understatement) when you're sleep deprived. For Sleepytime Secrets, Click Here! I wish you luck (and until then, very strong coffee)!

Getting Baby to Sleep: Develop a "Sleep Signal Routine"

2007-08-25T22:41:00.000-07:00

When my first child was 18 months old and starting to have tantrums, I remembered learning that toddlers have difficulty switching from one activity to the next and that it was good to give a 5 minute warning that it was time to get out of the tub, leave the park, get down from the highchair, etc. That way you can ease into the next activity and without surprising him. It didn’t really help with the tantrums, but when applied to bedtime, getting him to "ease into the idea" was very helpful.

Our firstborn had a night waking problem for almost his first year. We broke down and bought a book on the subject and we finally recognized his night waking as a sleep problem (not a hunger problem). We did have to teach him how to learn to fall asleep unassisted (meaning: cry it out). But we also learned to create sleep signal routine before we put him in his crib. With consistency using our sleep signal routine, we eventually got our baby to go to sleep unassisted in his crib without crying at all – unbelievable.

So what is a “sleep signal routine”? Hypnosis? No. It’s just a series of events the baby learns to expect that sleep will follow:

1.) breast or bottle feed

2.) change diaper and get on jammies

3.) read “Goodnight Moon”

4.) lullaby

5.) lay down in crib and go to sleep

It could be longer than that, if you want or shorter – but what’s important is that it’s consistent. And notice that you’re not feeding your baby to sleep.

Here's the book where I gleaned this information: "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. I've loaned out my copy so many times, I don't know where it is.

And I wanted to put a word in here about being afraid of the “cry it out” method. Please don’t let that keep you from reading a book that can help you. Almost every parenting book can help you in some way, even if you don’t agree with it. And in my next post I'll talk about what to try when you don't want to let your baby cry.

If you need some support or have some questions check out the new facebook group I just created!

And if you have a newborn, or are still anticipating the arrival of your baby, and would like to know how to start the right way with getting your baby to sleep, check out these articles.

2007-08-22T21:54:00.000-07:00

I still remember how lonely my husband and I felt the first night home from the hospital after the birth of our son. Our family brought us dinner and stayed a while. But when they left we felt like chasing after them saying, “No wait! Come back! You don’t know what you’re doing leaving us here with this thing!” We looked at each other and wondered what to do next. Well, it was bed time. So it only made sense to get ready and go to bed. We decided to put our son in bed with us and see if we could sleep. We turned out the lights. Then we saw this little head bobbing around in the darkness and his "wee beady little eyes." This marked the next year of no sleep for us.

We eventually broke down and bought a book on this subject: Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. I ordered this book at 5:30am from amazon.com. My baby woke up at this time after waking me up 3 times in the night and he wasn't going back to bed. This book changed everything for us.
And I couldn't believe I would actually have a child I could place in his crib awake and he would gently drift to sleep, but eventually I had just that! Do you like the picture I posted? My son, who is 8 now, cracks up over it!

In my family I had extreme opposite experiences with my two children. When I had my daughter, I read On Becoming Baby Wise: Giving Your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep by Gary Ezzo. In the beginning of the book, he describes exactly the same approach we had with scheduling and sleep with my son and he labeled it "attachment parenting." We were "text book" attachment parents. Our son slept in bed with us and we "nursed on demand"(which for us meant: nursed whenever he cried). In the Baby Wise book, the author made predictions for babies of attachment parents: that they would be continually discontent, and would have a night-waking problem long after night-waking is normal. I know his predictions were true -- we lived it! He predicted how it would be with his methods: that your baby would be generally content and would sleep during the day and at night without problems. We followed his methods with our second child and his predictions were correct for her. Strangers would marvel at how calm she was. I didn't really have tummy troubles with her like I did with my first. She's always been a good sleeper and has always gone to sleep unassisted. She rarely protested sleep and on the rare occasion she did, she would have stopped her crying by the time I descended the stairs.

A typical night with her as a newborn went like this: After nursing and changing her diaper, I put her in her crib at 8pm. She would wake up at 12am to nurse and go right back to sleep until 5am. After nursing again and a diaper change, she would go back to sleep until 8 or 9am. It stayed that way for the first month or so and at that time she was only waking me once in the middle of the night. By two months she was sleeping through the night.

I'd like to help you achieve the same thing with your baby. I know how miserable it is to not sleep. And I know how good it can be to have a baby who sleeps and is content. I wish you success with getting your baby to sleep!

Please read my other articles:

Getting Your Baby to Sleep: Starting Out Right

Getting Baby to Sleep: Should Baby be in Bed With You?

Would you like to ask some questions and get some support from other moms? Please, visit my facebook group for moms who need help getting baby to sleep.